3 Stages of Marriage
There is no man or woman that doesn't have a weak point and strengths. No man or woman is an angel. Every man and woman you see in this world whether born again or not is human, and therefore liable to errors. So you will never be happy in your marriage until you understand that your husband or wife is not God. Only God has no fault or weak point. Every man or woman has. My own weak point may be self opinionated while yours may be hot temper. However it is very important for you to know the weak points of your spouse and find out how to manage it positively without throwing sand in the air. In this post, I will be sharing with you the three Stages of Marriage with the aim that you will build your marriage and relationship with love, Unity and Oneness as you pass through these inevitable stages.
1. Honeymoon Stage - This is the beginning stage of every marriage. In this stage, the couple only see honey and moon light in their spouse without seeing any fault in their spouse. This stage for some people, begins from the Courtship and continues immediately after the wedding. For some couples it lasts for a few days, weeks, months or years before they enter the second stage which is the fault finding stage. But the truth is, your honeymoon can last forever. It all depends on your decision and commitment to making your marriage work. The Honeymoon stage is the best stage of Marriage and relationship because it is full of love, romance and commitment. If every marriage in the world remains in the Honeymoon stage of Marriage, no one will ever contemplate divorce or separation. But just like every other relationship, marriage is in stages, but people are in sizes. You need to build your relationship and marriage from grass to grace but ensure that your marriage and relationship doesn't go out of the Honeymoon
2. The Fault Finding Stage : As the name goes, that's what this stage is. Many couples who lose the Honeymoon stage, find themselves in the Fault finding stage. Because any time you stop seeing honey and moon in your spouse, the only thing you will see is fault. That doesn't mean that your spouse won't exhibit his or her weak points during the Honeymoon stage. Inevitably, the weak points will be there, but you won't notice them. And if you eventually notice them, because you are seeing honey and moon in the marriage and in your spouse, you will find a better way to manage it. The Fault Finding stage is the most difficult stage in Marriage and relationship. It is in this stage that many marriages and relationship break apart. Divorce and separation easily take place in this stage. Other cankerworms of Marriage pitch their tent in this dangerous stage of Marriage. So it is very dangerous to keep your marriage and relationship in the fault finding stage. When you find your marriage and relationship in the fault finding stage, the best thing to do is to reverse back to the first stage which is the Honeymoon stage or move forward to the last stage of Marriage which is the Acceptability Stage.
3. The Acceptability Stage : This is the stage where many couples adapt and accept their spouse the way they are. Many marriages that have lasted over 25 years to 50 years and above have entered their Acceptability Stage. It doesn't matter what the husband or wife can say or do, the spouse has accepted the marriage as it is. Marriages in the Acceptability Stage hardly break. At this stage, it is expected that the couple have even stopped giving birth to children. Their children may have grown into adults. So the parents are really advancing in age. One significant thing I need to tell you about this stage is that, the Acceptability Stage is of two types. One is positive, the other is negative. What I mean is this, there are couples who accepted their husbands or wives just for management. Deep in their hearts, they are regretting why they even got married to the person in the first place. But since divorce or separation is not an option, they chose to stay in the marriage with many bruises and wounds. That's a negative Acceptability Stage. But the positive Acceptability Stage begins from honeymoon and remains in the Honeymoon until death does them apart. This is the stage where the husband and the wife are sincerely satisfied with each other and remain ever grateful to God for bringing them together as husband and wife. In this stage, couple do things in common. There is mutual respect, love, unity, peace and commitment in the marriage and family. In Conclusion, there is no marriage without its own challenges. Don't run away from your marriage or relationship at the sight of challenges and crises. Stay there and work it out. By the grace of God you can make your marriage and relationship heaven on earth. Yes, your honeymoon can last forever.
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© Damian Alamba